New year new start and all that. With the worst economic crisis since 1929 an impending recession, seven month old daughter and a wife that works for HBOS, yes that HBOS, I’ve decided to take the entirely sensible decision to go back to full time freelancing for a living.
Inspired by Dave and his good lady wife we’re going to spend February travelling with the baby. Sadly, our travel plans are a little less international but we are stopping off in all all the home nations, well actually England, Wales and Scotland sorry Northern Ireland.
Were have no fixed itinerary yet but we are going to try and get all four corners and the Isle of Wight in and hopefully some friends will be able to point us in the direction of a nice Travelodge and Happy Eater. Hint, hint. Armed with nothing but a car full of baby crap and lifetime membership of English Heritage and the National Front Trust we’re going to point the steering wheel forwards and drive to the next stately home or ‘any reasonable time’ set of ruins and enjoy the country for a while.
I’ll be able to work thanks to my trusty 3 Mobile broadband but essentially we’ll be hippy types for a month. Albeit hippy types with a Honda Jazz and credit cards and mobile broadband but you get the point, I hope.
So, if you’ve got any suggestions as to where to visit with a baby please do let us know. The only firm destination we have so far in Monkey World, don’t ask. In essence the world is our lobster but in reality the south west of England and North of Scotland are going to be the main tramping grounds as we’ve already done most of the middle bit. London will, of course be on the list but not for too long as we’ve been there and done that too.
If you don’t have any suggestions as to where we should go perhaps you have some writing work that needs doing that I can help you with. I’ll have to get my ideas cap on and start bothering commissioning editors with some features too I suppose. Other than that I’m 20 working days away from having no fixed income at all which, like I said at the start of this entry, should be ok especially in these free and easy economic times.
It’s clear from this family photo that the only one having any second thoughts about my madcap plan is Niamh. Such insight for a baby.
This time last year I was preparing for a funeral. Les passed away on Christmas day and his funeral wasn’t to take place until the new year. It was a devastating way to begin a new year and it made celebrating a rather difficult affair. There wasn’t much to look forward to and the power of watching a person die is something I’m not sure can adequately be described in words or pictures. It’s simply something that exists in your conscience you carry it with you every day though it never quite reaches the surface.
This year, however, I’m preparing for a midnight that will include feeding a baby whilst fireworks announce the new year. Niamh was born at 16:11 on the 1st of June 2008 and weighed in at 7lbs 7oz, she didn’t cry. Apparently these are the important details - the ones I’m supposed to remember in 50 years and by which I’l be judged at some point in the future should I not be able to pluck one of the figures from my memory. Of course, right now I can’t imagine forgetting any of this information but you never know. The power of watching a person being born is so overpowering I’m not sure it can adequately be described in words or pictures. It’s simply something that exists in your conscience you carry it with you every day though it never quite reaches the surface.
I’m not entirely sure what I expected from the first six months of fatherhood but I don’t think it matters what your expectations are anyway, the reality of the situation must differ so much for each person. For me the most obvious change to my outlook has been perhaps the very, very obvious one of having a dependant. Someone for whom you are the world, or half of it at least. Niamh can say da da and does so when she sees me and though I know that right now it means more to me than her in time I know that will change.
I’m not a better person or a changed man because of the arrival of my daughter but something in my psyche has shifted. Perhaps I’m just a bit less selfish or more attuned to the needs of another person I’m not entirely sure but I do know that there’s nothing that matters more to me than the happiness and safety of my child. Obvious I know but it only really hits home when you have a blood covered towel containing a baby thrust upon you. When Joanne was pregnant I thought I was prepared but in reality I didn’t really appreciate the enormity of the situation until she was there breathing and shitting and eating (repeat to fade)…
Twelve months since we lost a member of the family and six since a new addition and things are very different yet almost entirely the same. Simply by ‘being’ Niamh brought a new dimension to Christmas. Opening her presents was more exciting than unwrapping my own. Playing with a plastic crab that plays tunes in order to get another of those screeching laughs intoxicating.
My first Christmas as a dad was a truly magnificent, magical, memorable and other words that begin with m time and it’s this I really hope to remember in 50 years time.
Happy new year.
Danny tries his first ever Tai Chi Latte.
